SinisterDucks

well here i am.. who am i.. i wonder.. i want the sky.. does that help.. she knows, ask her.. o wait she hates me.. not again.. not with that old thing.. how shall i pick the right weapon.. the right one to end my pain.. old fashioned six inch blade.. yeah i think thats good.. if you dont care then speak out now.. or you will wonder what happend to this once loved and cared about girl.. i hate myself for i have tried too many times that i am insecure.. screaming my infidelities.

i cant stop my tears they fall hot on my red cheeks i am broken here on the cold wood floor where did you go? it killed me I dont understand the music plays and it breaks my heart you smile and wish me well what did i do to deserve all of you then have you torn from my arms i am lonesome again i am dead all over again who will save me from this hell...

I wear my heart on my sleeve and my pain on my wrists what're you gonna do to help me outta this where can i find someone to love me where am i gonna find someone who cares you said you loved me you said we could touch the sky but why?

Loud music Dancing, smashing, crashing You move to the music like it were part of you Im intrigued Going so fast that no one can see You lose yourself to the rapid beat Plinking and drinking so much You are bound to the sound You're brave, you rave Keep your feet Don't get trapt in the beat You glow in the show of power With all your might, fight I see you crumble Under the moonlight over the streetsight I see your change You aren't forsaken Don't let them see who you are See hell in my eyes You seem so alive But with my touch, you die inside You've taken in the surprise Watch me grow with them I've given in, you're

I am all alone in this world of social you all stare at me like i am a parasite me in my mismatched pants and shirt you can roll your eyes like you dont care its okae i know you dont i hear your whispers as i walk past you in the hall as you push me into my locker call me faggot and call me fruit i smile as you follow me down the street threatening me you circle, you push the knife it cuts and bleeds me i fall, you leave and i am allowed to get up so i limp home as i smile to myself i am all alone in this world of social and i am happy.

Standing here in this crowded room It's all in my head Can I just get out on my own? I wish that I was there Without you standing next to me all the time How am I supposed to grow If you don't let me do my own thing It's your way or no way at all I can't stand your presence here I don't believe you're still here bugging me I wish I could silence your hard voice It echos in my mind it's stealing my sanity I play my music so loud I pretend I don't hear your screaming at my door Just walk away You don't accept me for who I am I have my own life now Just walk away

Nadalian By Irish Cream 06/09/04 Chapter One The moon rose just as the gnarled flowers closed around the near trimmed rows of mini red wood trees.  They were, of course, genetically modified so that gardeners could grow them with ease in their front yards.  The flowers were hundreds of years old; all twisted every which way, growing over 75 feet short.   I looked out my back door at the moonrise.  It was beautiful. I had gotten used to things being backwards on Nadalac.  The moon would rise just like the sun on earth, being just as bright but full of light browns and greys, unlike the pinks and purples on earth.  All the same when the s

  Difficulty by definition is something that is hard to overcome and takes time to get over.  Now I have been through many difficult things, but none of them are or were as difficult as being out about myself to the community.  The biggest kind of difficulty that I have begun to overcome has been discrimination.  Discrimination takes its toll on people, and there is a lot of discrimination going towards the LGBTQ community recently.  Because I am a part of this community people have begun to discriminate against me.  I knew how to deal with discrimination of other people, but I had never experienced people discriminating against me; calling

what if i told you what if i told you that things were gona change what if i told you that everything would be alright what would you do what would you do tell me what you're thinking tell me what you're feeling i hold my heart .. out to you i hold my hand .. out to you i never gave all of me to anyone else now really tell me what you're thinking now really tell me what you're planning i cant lose you i cant have you i cant want you but I Do.

Tears of pain stream down my face as I see you back away from me forever I cry as I reach out for you you are just beyond my finger tips I fall to my knees when you turn your back to me my heart stops beating as your eyes no longer wish to look upon me I start to dissapear as I stare into the infinite stars my body has gone into the dark abyss I can't find my way back no one is there to call me back from this shadow no one will remember the girl who Lost to Love.